Tomorrow (Tuesday, December 8th) we will be going back to the oncologist for a consultation and to schedule the d&c. I haven't gotten much sleep as it has been a long 111 days prepping for this next phase. I honestly do not know what to pray at this point. I know God has already written the story and that he can, if not already, 100% heal my body. However, that may not be his plan and I have to be ok with that. I know God doesn't ever want to hold back blessings from his children, but I also know reality and that God doesn't always give us the desires of our heart the way we think- he gives us what we need and in accordance to his will. I want to be super hopeful and I do have faith that he can heal me, but I also know that may not be Gods plan. So I am conflicted right now. I am basically saying ok God. You've got this- nothing I can do, or have done will change your all ready set plan for our family. I long, as most wives do, to grow our family- to have another pregnancy. But I am also prepared to let that it go- super hard, but ready. "Lord, here are my open hands. I am releasing control and desires to your will. I am not in control. I have been a steward of the task at hand and now trusting in you as my provider, comforter, great physician, and Lord of the details."

Please please pray for us Tuesday morning and the next few weeks as we go through this process.
Thank you. I will update as soon as we know more.